So before I get into this blog I just want to let you in on a few background points. If you have ever worked in a residential setting with people that have Intellectual or Developmental Disabilities you know the following....
A) It is the hardest, most rewarding job in the whole world.
B) Chicken is literally coming out of your ass.
Now some are probably saying, "Liz please elaborate" or "What the hell are you talking about." Well chicken I would say is the most common thing people make for meals when working in this type of job. Your menu consists of chicken Parmesan, baked chicken, rice with chicken, chicken noodle soup, grilled chicken, sauteed chicken, chicken salad, burnt chicken, dry chicken the list could go on. Why you ask?? My best guess is its cheaper then any other meat and its pretty hard to fuck up chicken. (don't get me wrong there are exceptions.)
For the better part of 13 years combined, my boyfriend Adam and I have worked in residential settings with Intellectual and Developmental Disabled Individuals. Upon leaving, chicken was never really a go to meal in our house. I mean over the years we ate enough chicken to last a life time and frankly when you have had chicken that much you never want to see it again. But fast forward to recently.....
Adam had texted me late in my work day, "Be ready to work when you get home, I wanna move the living room around." I sat at my desk at work over joyed that he was finally going to move the room around and I could FINALLY make it my place to pursue my blog and other adventures I had planned on making a reality! I literally was fist pumping like I was in a club (yes, it got that serious) to do extra work when I got home even though I was exhausted. To my surprise, when I got home the TV was already moved, one couch in the basement and the others situated just the way I wanted them. All I could say was "Why did you do this yourself? Why didn't you wait for me?" He just smiled and said "I wanted to surprise you. Oh and the couch is actually stuck on the stairs to go down to the basement." But that is a story for another time.
I started to help sweep the floors and the question came, "Babe, whats for dinner?" I cringed.
Now, earlier that morning I silenced my alarm three times and woke up an hour later than what I wanted too. Before I left the house I put the easiest dinner together in the crock pot nearly making us late to school to drop off my oldest daughter. School where we live starts at 8am for my SIX year old and we are F O R E V E R late. Whoever is in the school hierarchy that decided the best time to start school was before God himself wakes up is usually the brunt of my fits when were running late. Either way I rushed to put chicken ( I had taken out the night before), potatoes, onions, pepper and seasoning in the pot set it to low and ran out the door. Now remember before I said chicken was a fast, cheap and easy meal Adam could do without? Yeah, so when I got home you could smell it throughout the house. But when I replied with chicken and he was less than pleased.
If you know me, you know that I do not have to say a thing for anyone to know what I'm feeling. My facial expressions say it all. At that very moment my face was saying, "SIR, just eat the god damn chicken and shut your damn face!" His response to my face being all contorted was, "I'll just make Mac N Cheese and hot dogs. You know how I feel about chicken." Yes, I'm quite aware on how you feel about chicken. But we are not rolling in the dough so just like years before chicken was again, a cheap and easy meal.
At this point the girls had heard Mac N Cheese and any hope that I had in getting them to eat chicken was down the tubes. I felt so frustrated with Adam. Now I have all of this food that no one is going to eat. Great, I'm glad I make food for the dog. There are people in Asia that have NO FOOD you ungrateful shits!!! Now really sounding like my mother 15 years ago when I refused to eat the spinach she knew damn well I hated. UGH, what a waste!!!!
Now I get it, it's just a meal no big deal. But I took offense to it. Tell me someone else out there has not felt this way before. You have and you know it even if you fail to admit it. "Why is it that whenever I cook anything it always a problem? Why can't he just suck it the fuck up and eat the damn chicken? Its good for you. I'm trying to lose weight and get in shape. Chicken is healthy! Why can't he understand that?!?!" I wanted to lose my shit! Then I walked over to the crock pot to check on it. I put to much damn water in the crock pot, AGAIN! What the hell!!!!!
As I started making the Mac N Cheese and hot dogs, frustrated that Tweedledee aka me, couldn't manage to measure out the water because I was in a rush, I really thought why I was upset. I was upset because Adam didn't want to eat the chicken. Well I already knew that. This wasn't new news to me. I was mad that he didn't understand that chicken was healthy and I was on a diet. Again, though he supports me dieting, he is not nor does he need to be on any kind of diet. The man already lost over 150 pounds. To be honest my chicken was drowned in water and frankly I didn't want it either. So why was I still feeling upset? Because Adam didn't just say "Oh okay babe sounds good, Ill eat something I fucking hate just because you made something knowing I hate it!" It's not like Adam to just do what someone else wants because they say so. At the end of the day I was upset because I thought I was doing an easy meal that would be ready when we got home. Something quick, no stress dinner that would be plated in record time and everyone would jump up and down that I made the best chicken in the world. Well not going to happen friends, not going to happen.
I had to step back and take this one in. "Your acting like a 5 year old because someone won't play with you in the sand box. Snap out of it! Don't fight over something so tiny! Your being an emotional, menstrual mess. Get your shit together!!" Adam says to me all the time don't sweat the small stuff and he's so damn right, especially with this instance. Life is to short to be mad over dumb shit. Fighting over dinner is completely ridiculous and fighting over chicken is probably even worse.
I know that I get emotional over E V E R Y T H I N G. Seriously sometimes I don't know how Adam deal with the hot mess express that I am from time to time. But in our world I also think as people we tend to take things so personally. Things get blown out of proportion and it ruins friendships, relationships and so much more. We need to stop that shit. I, personally need to stop crying over spilled milk. I realize when I am wrong and when I overreact though sometimes I hate to admit that I did such things. Take things for face value unless otherwise told so. Example: Your a dumb, low life, scum of the earth asshole. By all means go ape shit on someone if anyone ever came out their face with crazy nonsense like that!!!! Otherwise, as Elsa from Frozen would say, LET IT GO, LET IT GO!!!!! ( you just sang that in your best Elsa voice, I know it!) You will let go of unneeded stress and be so much happier in life. Be amazing every chance you can and be so happy other around you feed off of your vibe! Easier said than done, I know but here is a bit of advice I have been doing recently.
Everyday say things to yourself that lifts you up. Like, I'm a bad ass, I can and will accomplish all of my dreams, I will have a wonderful day and the world loves me. Sounds stupid right? Well I'm not asking you to say it out loud so just DO IT! I promise you will see a change in your days and life as soon as you start. If you put out good energy you get back even better energy. In the lovely words of my loving, amazing boyfriend who puts up with my shit, (but lets not get it twisted I put up with his too) "Don't sweat the small stuff." -Adam B.
Side Note:: Kraft Mac N Cheese and Kosher hot dogs are not the healthiest meal but they sure are bangin!!!
That's all loves. As always please comment, share, like and let me know how you feel!!! Stay Gorgeous!!!
XOXO
Elizabeth
